Vampires Vs Akatsuki
by NerdyBookLover
Summary: The people of Morganville are in for a surprise when the Akatsuki show up out of nowhere. Will they fight it out or will they come together to fight against a common enemy? I feel so special...I'm the first one to write for Morganville and Naruto together
1. Chapter 1

**This is the first crossover I've ever done. If it sucks, please don't kill me. I'm not sure how long I want this to be or anything, so if you want me to have an idea of yours included, you can leave a comment and I will try to fit some things in, because I honestly don't know where I'm going with this. I just thought there should be a Morganville Vampires/Naruto crossover. Beware of OOC-ness. And just to be clear- everyone in this fanfic speaks English. This is post-Feast of Fools.**

"Danna, where are we, un?" A young blonde man asked. He was walking through a small town, dimly lit by the street lamps. A redheaded male walked beside him, seeming bored, but eyes flickering every which way in search of danger.

"I don't know, Deidara. The jutsu that Leader-sama was testing out obviously backfired and we ended up here. The question is… where is everyone else?" At that, the blonde started looking around, hoping to spot his comrades. Nothing much was in sight, just some old houses. The air was warm and there was a soft breeze that ruffled the blonde's long hair. They continued to walk on in silence until the redhead stopped.

"Sasori no danna? What is it, un?" The moment the words left the blonde's mouth a shadow stepped out in front of them. It was obviously a person, but something in the way it moved alerted the two to the fact that it wasn't human. Not that that scared them. The eyes that glowed red in the darkness were also a sign that whatever this thing was, it wasn't friendly. Despite this fact, Deidara stepped forward.

"What do we have here, un? That doesn't look like the Sharingan, does it, Danna, un?" Sasori didn't answer; his eyes fixed on the creature before them. Finally it spoke, its voice low and deadly.

"What would two pretty little boys like you be doing walking around by yourselves at night?" His eyes flickered down to their wrists. "Not protected, either. That's not a very smart move on your part." Sasori kept watching him, looking bored with the situation.

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but my friend and I have some things that need taking care of. So if you're not going to help us, I suggest you get out of the way." The man- or whatever it was- growled, showing his elongated canines in the process. Fangs, Sasori noted with interest. One of his puppets had fangs.

"You need to be taught a lesson don't you? Learn your place. We run this town." Deidara laughed softly.

"Well it's a good thing we aren't from here, isn't it? I wouldn't want to have to follow rules made by someone as pathetic as you, un." The man growled again, eyes flashing white.

"Fine then. But you asked for it." Then he launched himself at Deidara. Deidara, being the trained ninja he is, saw the attack coming. He jumped up, dodging the blow that would have at _least_ knocked him unconscious. He laughed again when the man repeated the action, only to fail again.

"Wow, Danna. Did you see how bad that last one was, un? This guy is terrible when it comes to fighting. What are you anyway? You're obviously not human, un."

"I'm a vampire, idiot. Although I guess you wouldn't know that seeing as you're new here and all. You won't be here for long, though."

"Oh? And what makes you think that, un?"

"You wouldn't last five minutes in this town."

"Enough with the playing, Dei. We need to find the others. If you're not going to get rid of this guy, then I will." Sasori cut in, pulling a scroll from his back. He opened it and preformed a few hand signs. A puppet appeared on the ground in front of him, its eyes cold and unfeeling. The vampire took a few steps back, not quite knowing what to do at this point. Sasori continued.

"You aren't worth the use of my art, but I'm not going to take any chances." He moved his fingers, and that was when the vampire noticed the blue-ish strings of what looked like energy coming from them and attaching to the puppet. If his heart was still beating, it would have been pounding in his chest. With a flick of his wrist, Sasori made the puppet appear in front of the vampire. He moved another finger and a knife suddenly stabbed his opponent in the side. That wasn't enough to kill him, but it did make him falter for a moment. Sasori made his puppet attack again, noticing out of the corner of his eye, that there were more shadows joining them. He looked over at Deidara, who had also noticed and nodded. The blonde knew what he would have to do, and smiled. This evening was about to get a little more interesting.

**My sister is kicking me off the computer so I have to go now. I'll try to update as soon as possible. Even if no one reads it.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you CalyGamer13! I probably wouldn't have updated if you hadn't motivated me. I felt really good, so I decided to update… now… Anyway, I thought I had mentioned this before, but I don't think I did- This is going to have shonen-ai (at the least). Sorry if you don't like that, but I need to. **_**Italics=thoughts.**_

An explosion was heard in the distance.

"What the hell was that?"

"Sit down, Oliver. It is rude to ignore someone when you are in the middle of a very serious discussion." A graceful, elegant looking woman sat in a high backed chair. A table was situated in between hers and another chair, this one having previously been occupied by a… hippy-looking man (for lack of better term). Now he was standing by the window, looking out into the dark Texas night.

"Aren't you worried about what's going on out there?"

"Not unduly, no. It will all sort itself out I'm sure. I'm more concerned with the matter at hand. What are we going to do about Bishop? We need some sort of plan, don't you think?"

"Of course we do, but…"

"But what, Oliver?"

"Amelie, come here for a moment." The woman stood, leaning over to look out the window along with Oliver.

"What is that?" Oliver inquired. Amelie was silent for a moment.

"I'm not sure, but we should go see. Make sure everything's okay." Oliver grunted.

"I thought you just said that it would be fine."

"I did." Amelie straightened and walked out the door, her two bodyguards that had been standing in the shadows finally showing themselves and following her out. Oliver sighed and followed as well.

*******

"Itachi, are you sure we're going the right way?"

"Hn."

"Was that a yes? It's hard to tell with you."

"Hn."

"Okay, now you're doing it just to annoy me." An explosion nearby stopped him from saying anything else. For a minute.

"I guess we've found Deidara. And probably Sasori, too. Those two are inseparable."

"Told you we were going the right way, Kisame." Itachi mumbled. The man beside him stopped in his tracks. His hair was blue, as was his skin. He had what looked like gills on his cheeks and a huge sword was on his back. He was big and muscular, the kind of person you definitely wouldn't want to meet in a dark ally. His companion, on the other hand, had long, black hair. His features were delicate, almost like porcelain and his eyes were red. They weren't red all the time, but they were now because he had some premonition of what was to come.

"I'm sorry, Itachi. But did you just say a complete sentence out loud?" His voice was dripping with sarcasm. "That's shocking! You know, I am so proud of you right now. I could give you a hug."

"You touch me you die."

"Ooohh… but Tachi-chan. Please? I promise I won't bother you for the rest of the… night."

"No." Kisame looked crestfallen.

"Okay. I understand." Itachi looked over at him, and instantly regretted it. _I never was good at denying him anything._ He sighed loudly.

"Fine. You can hug me. But if you ever tell anyone that I let you do this, I _will_ use mangekyo sharingan on your ass." Kisame looked over at him, looking way too excited in Itachi's opinion. He was so excited, apparently, that he had to glomp his precious Tachi-chan, causing them both to fall to the ground.

"Yay! Thank you so much! I love you Tachi-chan! You are my favoritest person in the whole wide world!"

"That's not even a word." Itachi, despite himself, was kind of enjoying this. It felt good to be loved. "Anyway, since when are you all…"

"…All cute and adorable?"

"Those basically mean the same thing. And no, I was thinking more along the lines of… childish, girly, annoying—"

"Hey, don't be so mean to me! And besides, you're acting different too. You're actually talking for once." Itachi just looked at him.

"I talk when it's necessary."

"So it's necessary for you to talk to me?" Itachi looked away for a moment, a faint blush dusting his pale face.

"Not really. Sometimes I just… get bored."

"You must be really bored right now, then." Itachi's blush grew more pronounced. Kisame noticed, but didn't have time to think about why because there was another explosion, this one a lot closer than the other. "I guess we should go see if those two need help."

"Yeah, let's do that." Kisame got up off of Itachi and helped him to his feet. With that they left, heading towards the screams that they now were hearing. Kisame chuckled.

"I'm glad those two are having fun. I hope there's some left for us." Itachi smirked.

"Yes, that would be nice."

*******

"Danna! Did you see that? It was awesome, un! My best work yet!"

"Don't get too ahead of yourself there, brat."

"But you saw it didn't you? What did you think, un?" The energetic blonde was bouncing up and down, his eyes shining brightly under the street lights. Sasori looked at him, a look of amusement and… something else crossing his features before quickly being locked up under a mask of indifference.

"It was… loud. And colorful. And, I guess… in a way… artistic." Deidara's eyes widened.

"Danna… did you just say what I think you just said, un?" Sasori sighed. He hated having to repeat himself. It wasted valuable time.

"Yes, Dei. I said it was artistic. In a way." And despite all of his ninja training, the poor redhead wasn't able to defend himself from the blonde as he tackled him to the ground.

"Thank you so much, Danna, un! You have no idea what that means to me, un." Unfortunately for Sasori (who realized too late what a compromising position he was in), it was at that moment when Itachi and Kisame had to find them. He was fist aware of his predicament when he heard Kisame yell:

"Hey puppet-boy! I never pegged you as the uke!" Matters were made worse when Itachi decided to join in on the fun.

"You never can tell with some people, Kisame." At that, Sasori pushed Deidara off him and stood up.

"Shut up, you two. Where were you? And where is everyone else?"

"We were hoping you would know that. And what was going on over here. We heard Deidara's explosions."

"We ran into some trouble. Nothing we couldn't handle. We did learn something, though."

"And what might that be?"

"This place is run by vampires."

"Hm. That is interesting." A new voice was heard, coming from the shadows. Everyone present looked in the direction the voice was coming from. They couldn't make out any features, but the eyes were clearly visible. They were grey-ish and swirly.

"Leader-sama." They said simultaneously.


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm so awesome! Not really, but I feel like it because I'm updating two of my stories in one day. A great accomplishment, in my opinion. Sorry for the wait, but I am insanely lazy. My friends yell at me for it all the time. Anyway, I hope you like it. And if you haven't noticed, I've been changing point of view every once in a while to random people or third person. **

_~Previously~_

"_This place is run by vampires."_

"_Hm. That is interesting." A new voice was heard, coming from the shadows. Everyone present looked in the direction the voice was coming from. They couldn't make out any features, but the eyes were clearly visible. They were grey-ish and swirly._

"_Leader-sama." They said simultaneously. _

"Did you find anything else out?" Leader-sama asked the group. He took note of the fact that Kakuzu and Hidan had yet to grace them with their presence. His own partner, Konan, was standing next to him in the shadows. He had sent Zetsu and Tobi in the opposite direction to find anyone they could. Hopefully they would find the other two. Sasori stepped forward.

"That was all we got, sir. This town is run completely by vampires- strong ones at that. They were very fast, fast enough to evade some of my fastest moving puppets even. But they seemed a little more susceptible to Deidara's attacks. I think light affects them. And they don't die very easily. You can't kill them the same way you kill a normal human. They need to be stabbed in the heart or blown up." Leader nodded his head at that, not that the others would really be able to tell.

"That is more than we knew when we showed up here. Good work Sasori, Deidara. We will wait here for the others and then we will find a place to stay where we won't bring too much attention to ourselves."

"Your wait is already over." A tall man with a venus flytrap encasing his head from the shoulders up stated. That was Zetsu. Beside him walked a silver haired man with a scythe and a tan man with stitches running all over the visible parts of his body. Hidan and Kakuzu. Behind them, a tall man was skipping and humming happily to himself. He had a swirly orange mask on and there was one eyehole in it for him to see out of. And, last but not least, Tobi. Leader felt the knot in his chest loosen considerably. He may not act like it-ever- but he actually cared for the well being of his members.

"Good. It is time for us to move out. We will move out of this place as soon as I figure out how to. Until then, we must gather as much information as we can on these vampires. If they already attacked us, then they obviously don't want us here. Were any of you attacked?" He directed his question at the new arrivals.

"We didn't have anyone come right up to us. But the people we saw were all heading in this direction. We followed them and found you." Kakuzu said. Leader was about to say something, but he noticed the frown on Deidara's face.

"Deidara? Is there something you would like to say?" The blonde boy looked up, startled. He nodded.

"Un. It's just that… these vampires… the first one mentioned something about protection. As if there was such a thing among them, un. And they all looked at our wrists as if they were expecting something to be there. I think that there are humans here too, un, not just vampires, and that they have certain ways of making sure they aren't, well, eaten." Leader-sama nodded at that, grateful for the information.

"That information could prove useful. Thank you, Deidara." The blonde's eyes widened. Leader-sama never thanked anyone unless he had to. But before anyone could ask anything, they felt another presence.

"Well, well, well. What is this?" They all turned and saw a lanky man walking towards them. His hair was long, tied back in a ponytail, almost like Itachi's but lighter in color. He was very pale and they all noticed the glint of his fangs as he smiled at them.

"Amelie, what are your orders?" Another figure joined them, this one a woman with long white hair. Leader-sama immediately saw in her what he often saw in himself- the stress of being in charge. The woman locked eyes with him and then turned to her subordinate.

"I'd rather like to talk with them, Oliver. Your orders are to stand there and be quiet until I'm done." With that, she turned back to the group, looking them over. "Why are you here?" Leader-sama stepped forward, showing his authority, barely noticing how both vampires' eyes widened when the shadows came with him into the dimly lit street, still blocking his face from view.

"We came here accidently. I was… experimenting… and we all ended up here. All we wish is to be given enough time to figure out how to get back." Amelie looked at them suspiciously.

"Then why are some of my people dead?"

"They attacked us. It was purely self defense. We would not have done anything otherwise." The woman nodded, understanding showing in her eyes.

"I will take the blame for their attack. You are not protected, so they assumed you were fair game. I will make sure to change that. But for now I would greatly appreciate it if you followed me. I will find a place for you all to stay, but I have some more questions to ask." Leader-sama nodded and followed, hearing the footsteps of the others behind him. He stayed shadowed, despite the fact that there was no longer any immediate threat.

***********

They were seated in a conference room at the town's police station. They were being taken separately into the interrogation room. Leader was not nervous, nor was anyone else. They were trained shinobi and murderous S-ranked criminals. It would take more than a few death threats or the flash of fangs to break them.

************

**Sasori's point of view:**

They picked me first. Of course they did. They thought I was the youngest, and therefore most likely to break down and tell them everything I know. But oh how wrong they were. I'm going to enjoy this. I snapped myself out of my thoughts when the man started asking me questions.

"So, what's your name kid?" I smiled inwardly. This guy was probably in his mid-twenties at the most. Definitely younger than me.

"Sasori." I won't give him any more information than I have to. That's how I work. We all have our own style when it comes to messing with people's heads. Deidara would give you way more information than you needed, but he was always able to stray from the original line of questioning. Hidan swore at you until you ran away. Kisame didn't really have to do anything; everyone was already scared of him because he looked like a shark. Tobi was really hyper and kept going on about how he was a good boy and telling you about every single thing he had done that day. Though that was how he was all the time. Kakuzu would blatantly ignore you, instead choosing to count his money, every once in a while asking you to shut up. Itachi was emotionless as always, and usually only answered with a 'Hn'. Leader-sama scared the crap out of you and the fact that he managed to stay in shadow when you were pointing a light directly at him didn't really help. Zetsu was usually the scariest, though, what with his other personality and his tendency to eat people. And argue with himself about eating someone right in front of them. Konan was probably the nicest. She answered politely and made people origami flowers. For some reason people didn't seem to notice the fact that the paper came out of nowhere.

I looked back over at the guy. Apparently he had said something and was waiting for an answer. "I'm sorry, what was that?" He sighed, obviously wishing he didn't have to sit with boring old me. Maybe I should make this more exciting for him.

"I said, who are your friends?"

"I don't see why you're asking me. They're all going to be in here after me, so you'll find out from them."

"Alright, smart-ass. One more question and I'll leave you alone. How did you guys end up here?" I thought over that for a moment, wondering how I should answer. I was just about to open my mouth when I heard Leader-sama's voice in my mind.

"Change the topic. Don't tell him about the jutsu." Instead of questioning how he could possibly know what I was being asked, I focused on the task at hand.

"I have a question for you, actually. Are you a vampire?" The man looked at me, clearly annoyed.

"No, I'm human. But if you want, I could go get a vampire for you if you don't answer the question."

"Yes." He looked at me in disbelief.

"What?"

"I would like you to bring me a vampire." He just stared at me for a moment, obviously questioning my sanity.

"You want me to get you a vampire? Are you crazy?"

"People have been known to call me that, it's true. But I prefer to think of myself as an artist." The poor officer looked really confused now.

"And what exactly is your art?" he asked suspiciously.

"I make puppets. They can only be used by myself or another skilled puppet master, though I doubt you'd be able to find one alive of my caliber. They are my weapon of choice. Oh-" I said suddenly, as if just remembering something. "Would you like to see my greatest work of art? It's my masterpiece, really." He seemed reluctant, but curious at the same time. He nodded. I almost smiled. He seemed a bit confused when I started to remove my Akatsuki cloak, but when he saw my heart box, he paled. He looked at my joints, clearly visible, and definitely made of wood. The cable wrapped around where my stomach should have been slowly unwound, it's poisonous tip now inches from the officer's nose. "My masterpiece." I said quietly, deadly. He swallowed audibly and tried to look away from the sharp point and failing miserably.

"Um, I think we're done here." I nodded in agreement and rewound the cable, pulling my cloak back over my shoulders as well. I followed him back out of the room to where the others were sitting, waiting. I sat back down in my original seat and looked around at the expectant faces. This time I did smile, though it was dark and dangerous.

"Piece of cake." Was all I said, and the others relaxed completely. Hidan and Kakuzu started arguing, Itachi and Kisame were talking quietly, Zetsu was trying his best to ignore a bouncing Tobi, and Leader-sama and Konan were sitting quietly next to each other. I looked to my right where Deidara was sitting. He was focused on one of his hand mouths, which was currently chewing a piece of clay. When he felt my gaze on him, he looked up and smiled.

"So, what did they ask you, Danna, un?"

"My name, who you guys were, and how we go here."

"And what did you say?" Leader-sama asked. The others had stopped talking now and were looking at me again.

"I told them my name, that you guys would tell them your own and there was no need to ask me, and I didn't answer the last one. I just showed the poor guy my masterpiece and he said we were done." Deidara started giggling and I smirked at him. Just then they called for Hidan and the group was quiet again. We waited for a moment as the door closed behind him, listening for the sounds we knew we would hear. We weren't disappointed. Within the first minute, we heard Hidan swearing loudly and yelling at the officer about how Lord Jashin was going to smite his heathen ass. Deidara started giggling again, and Kisame and Tobi followed suit. Me, Konan, Itachi, and Zetsu were trying to hold back smiles. Kakuzu sighed and Leader-sama just shook his head, but again, no one really noticed. I leaned back in my seat. This was going to be a long night.

**Just like with my story A New Member that I updated today, this is my longest chapter so far. I hope you guys liked it. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Oh My Goodness! I'm finally updating! Lucky you (whoever is reading this). I sincerely apologize for the majorly long wait. How many months was it? Seven? Jeez, I'm such a terrible person. At this rate I'll never become a novelist. I'd never make the deadlines! Thank you to anyone who is still interested in this story despite my laziness. I think you need to start yelling at me when you want updates from now on. And just so you know, to make things easier, everyone speaks English in this, except for every once in a while where I might add some Japanese.**

**General POV:**

"Amelie, what are we going to do with them? We can't just let them have free reign over the town. And if _you _give them protection, people will be suspicious. And—"

"Oliver, calm down. I'm going to deal with this, don't worry. I understand that we can't just let them do what they want, and I never had any intention of allowing that to happen in the first place. But we also can't let _our_ people constantly attack _them_."

"Why not? All they've done since they've gotten here is kill some of us and insult our intelligence."

"Maybe that's because we gave them a good reason to. All _we've_ done since they've gotten here is attack them and then interrogate them. They have no reason to trust us or to cooperate at all, but they have… in a way. They haven't attacked us or extracted any kind of revenge. I think it would be in everyone's best interest if we came to a truce. We will protect them in return for them not attacking us. They've already shown that they can handle themselves against our kind easily enough."

"Which means that they are more of a threat than anyone else currently in town besides Bishop. And we were already busy enough trying to deal with him."

"Then I guess we should help these people to get back to wherever they came from as soon as possible."

Sigh. "You'd better be right, Amelie."

"I am."

**Miranda's POV:**

_*Accidentally. That's how they arrived. They made their way, walking on clouds the color of blood in a black sky. They are many colors. I see yellow, red, a lot of black, orange, some blue, silver, green... But why are they here? Here? No, hear. Something is calling out to me. What are you saying?*_

"Mir? Hey, Miranda. Are you ok?"

"Someone's here." I said quietly, though I'm sure Eve heard. Michael as well.

"Who's here?" I heard him ask.

"There are new people in Morganville." I said, loudly this time, so everyone in the room could hear. We were currently all sitting in the Glass House, Shane and Michael playing video games and wishing I wasn't there. Claire sitting next to Shane on the couch, studying. And Eve, who had been talking to me until I was dragged into… whatever that was.

"What do you mean? Someone new moved in?" Claire asked, curious as ever.

"No. These people aren't here to stay. They are stuck here. They want to go home, but are not sure how. They are special."

"And you're crazy." Shane muttered to himself. No one argued with him.

Just then Claire's phone rang. Michael paused the game. Something that had to do with killing zombies.

"Hello?" Pause. "You need me there now? And Michael? Why don't we all just go?" Another pause. "Ok. Yeah, we'll be there soon." She hung up.

Looking around the room at everyone, she said, "Amelie wants us to meet her at Common Grounds. Apparently she has some news."

I stood up. They won't need me there. "I have to go, then. Goodbye."

Murmurs of 'bye' were heard around the room. They still think I'm crazy. I'm sure Amelie is about to prove otherwise.

**General POV: (at Common Grounds)**

"It doesn't look like anyone's here." Claire stated.

"Nope. Guess we have to go and check it out." Eve started walking towards the door, pulling out the key that she still carried everywhere with her. Once the door was unlocked, Michael opened the door, just in case there was any type of threat. Immediately, they noticed the difference between what they could see from the outside and what was actually inside. While the windows appeared to be dark, there were actually shades drawn to block out all light. It also blocked anyone on the outside from seeing who or what was inside.

They were quickly ushered in by Amelie's bodyguards, and ended up standing near a table of strange looking people.

There were nine of them visible, excluding Amelie, Oliver, Myrnin, and the aforementioned bodyguards.

"Do you think these are the people that Miranda was talking about?" Claire asked Eve. Said girl frowned and decided to voice Claire's curiosity and her own impatience.

"Who the hell are they?" _They _turned to look at the new arrivals, taking in their appearances, while also subtly checking for weaponry. More out of habit than necessity.

"We are Akatsuki. And we were told that you would be the ones to explain the rules of this town. We're not from around here, so we need to know what we can and cannot do in a town filled with vampires." The voice came from the shadows, a pair of grey eyes being the only indication of a person being there at all.

"So I guess Miranda was right. There are new people in Morganville. She also mentioned that you are trying to get back to where you came from. And that you're… special. That explains how you know about the vamps." Shane said.

A woman with blue hair frowned and leaned over into the shadows where the voice had come from. She whispered something that only the vampires could hear. Shane, Eve, and Claire looked over at Michael, but he just shook his head. Then they heard a sigh from the shadows and a man stepped forward.

At first the shadows came with him, but then they fell back and everyone present saw who they had been hiding. A man with spiky orange hair and piercings all over his face, expressionless, his swirly grey eyes devoid of any emotion. He looked to be in his late twenties, early thirties. All of the people in his group quickly looked away except for the blue haired woman, who was apparently the only female among them.

"Oh, yes. We are very special." The man said. He walked forward to meet them face to face. "Let me start with the introductions. You may call me Pain. This here is Konan. That is Hidan, Kakuzu, Zetsu, Kisame, Sasori, Tobi, Itachi, and Deidara." He said, pointing to each person as he said their name.

Eve was still frowning. "Ok. I guess I'll introduce us now. I'm Eve, that's Michael, Shane, and Claire."

Pain nodded, taking note of each name and connecting it with the face easily. Amelie stepped forward finally, deciding that she should explain.

"This group -Akatsuki- they are, as you said, special. They have certain talents that aren't normal among any human we've ever seen. They ended up here accidentally and need time to find their way back to where they came from. But until then, we have agreed to protect them as much as we can in return for their promise of peace, which they have readily agreed to. I was hoping that you would be able to explain to them the rules of the town, seeing as my hands are a bit full at the moment."

Everyone was quiet for a moment before Claire stepped forward. "I don't know about you guys," she said to her friends, "but I'm up for it. This could be…fun." Shane was immediately by her side, his hand on her shoulder.

"Same here."

"Ditto." Eve said, holding Michael's hand, who was nodding his consent.

"Then it's settled. If you could possibly show them around a little as well, that would be wonderful. When you are done, please bring them back here. Thank you." Amelie looked over at Oliver and Myrnin (who hadn't spoken a word the whole time) and nodded. "Now, if you could please be on your way. We have some things we need to take care of."

As they all walked through the small town, they seemed to draw some attention to themselves. Especially Tobi, who was running and jumping and skipping and yelling 'Tobi is a good boy!' at everyone he saw. They also started to get to know each other.

Eve and Konan got along just fine, complaining to each other about the things they had to put up with being surrounded by guys. Shane was talking animatedly with Kisame and Hidan about videogames, which he promised to make them play as soon as possible. Michael was speaking quietly with Sasori about art and music, while Deidara followed close behind, correcting his danna on what true art was whenever he could. Claire was talking to Itachi, Kakuzu, and Pain about the vampires. And Zetsu was keeping an eye on Tobi and talking to himself.

Claire had suggested that they stop at the university because she had skipped classes that day and wanted to find out what she had missed. The moment they arrived, heads turned. The members of Akatsuki were alerted to this right away and all mentally agreed to be prepared for anything. Itachi's eyes wandered over everything, looking for potential threats. He found one almost immediately. Long hair blowing in the dry Texas breeze, face painted with makeup, and looking like a cheap whore, but with class, what appeared to be a student came strutting up to them. Behind her was a small group of people, a few girls looking almost exactly like her and some guys staring at their asses as they walked ahead of them.

The first girl came right up to them. "Hey freak. Who are your friends?" The question was directed at Claire, who in turn smiled sweetly.

"Oh don't worry, Monica. They won't want to meet you. So you can go now, thanks."

The girl, Monica, glared at her. "What do you know, freak? If these people don't want to meet me, then they haven't been hanging around the right people." She turned to face Itachi, who was standing next to Claire. "And who might you be?" she purred.

Itachi almost smiled when she jumped back after he activated his Sharingan. "I'm your worst nightmare." He was about to put her in a genjutsu, but Kisame put a hand on his shoulder.

Monica and her little group were backing up slowly. "What are you? Are you a—"

"A vampire? No. _We_ are all actually… ninja." The group stopped backing away and froze, then burst out laughing.

"You're… you're a ninja? What the hell is this? Some stupid prank that these idiots came up with?" Monica gestured to Claire and the others.

"Oi, Hidan! Come here for a second." Kakuzu said, trying not to lose his temper. Hidan came over, surprisingly quiet, though Kakuzu could tell it was due to anger. Kakuzu smirked under his mask and called for the attention of the students. "Watch this." Was all he said before he moved to punch Hidan, his arm, from the elbow down, detaching from the rest of his body, with only black strings keeping them together. His fist hit Hidan right in the side of the head, simultaneously causing Hidan's head to fly off, going over everyone's heads and landing in the shade a few feet behind Monica's group.

Everything was quiet, and everyone, Claire's group included, seemed terrified. Then a sound of spluttering reached their ears, coming from behind them. Everyone turned and saw Hidan's decapitated head spitting out grass and dirt.

"The fuck, Kakuzu? You could have at least warned me, you son of a bitch. Put me back together! I need to sacrifice your ass to Lord Jashin!"

"Shut up, Hidan!" All of Akatsuki (including Tobi) yelled.

Zetsu went over to Hidan's head and picked it up. "**Can we eat him?** No we can't eat him, he's part of our group! **But all he ever does is swear and threaten people. **So? All _we_ ever do is argue and eat the bodies that need to be disposed of. **That's better than Hidan."**

Pain sighed, looking at everyone's surprised and horrified expressions. "No, Zetsu, you can't eat Hidan. Kakuzu, please reattach Hidan's head. Now." He turned to Monica. "And as for you, I suggest you run away before I decide to show you what _I_ can do."

Predictably enough, Monica chose to listen to him. Pain sighed again and turned back to Claire and the others.

"So… what now?"


End file.
